I Got an Andy Capp Hot Fry in my Keyboard

Stupid Andy Capp and his tasty-ass hot fries. It's a laptop, there's no bouncing back from this one. It's gonna take therapy. The stupid piece of baked corn and potato greatness is right there. I can see it, I just can't... quite... reach it... Need coffee.--- Ok, got coffee. So this fry isn't impeding anything. Not screwing up any words or letters, but it's just sitting there, all orange and stuff. It irks me. I'm off Andy Capp for awhile. I'll have no more of this. By the way, the suggested spelling of "Capp" is cape, on spell check. See for yourself. It's good cape weather.

There's nothing lonelier than an ignored Slip and Slide. It's just squirting away here next to me, waiting for any kid to walk on up and take a chance. Don't know if anyone's taken a look at one since 4th grade, but it's got warnings now. All over it. No one over 5 feet tall or 110 pounds. More coffee.---Got it. Man, I'm a chuggin' the old Java today. And I'll keep on a-chuggin it, Mack!! That's right, I said Mack. No one says mack anymore, so I've decided to bring it back. I'm bringin' back the mack, mack. Matay and I have discussed this. We agreed I was an idiot.

Speaking of Matay, he and I are going to Korea to golf. When's the last time you and your friend went to golf in Korea, hmm? In January, we drove to Red Deer, Alberta, Canada to eat Greek food, twice. There's a lot more to both of those stories, but we wouldn't sound as cool and care-free. More coffee.---That's the last of it. Next beverage is gonna be lemonade.

Have you ever gotten dressed in front of a dog and wondered what the dog was thinking? Slammed it! The coffee portion of today is officially over. Shot-gunning coffee makes me feel less asleep. I like to come out to my backyard when my Chihuahua's are there. I always say, "Where's my dog's at". It makes me feel all Gangstah and shit. They just look at me. You can waste a lot of humor on a dog. Someday they'll laugh.

I think I'll get on with something else for awhile. The coffee's got me zooted. I think I'll just stop typing mid-sentence for a creative way to